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16 July 2014 @ 01:46 pm
About half an hour after my family and I finished our meals for sahur earlier this morning, my mother went to my room and informed me with a shaky voice, "Sarah...Aunty Zakiah dah takde (Sarah... Auntie Zakiah passed away)".

The news shocked me so much that it rendered me speechless. I knew how much Aunty Zakiah's existence meant to my mum. She was a close friend of hers. A long-time friend, even. Both of them went to the same university, studied the same course and it was long after that they found out that both of them even applied jobs at the same company. Both of them got it and were even placed at the same department at one point. They looked after each other throughout their years at the department and stuck by each other through thick and thin.

It was no surprise that the news reduced both of us to torrential tears.
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15 July 2014 @ 05:32 pm
Wahai sang srikandi,
Tatkala kau jatuh terduduk,
Dan tidak mampu untuk bangkit semula,
Bahawa Dia sentiasa ada untuk membantumu.

Wahai sang srikandi,
Tatkala kau rasa ingin menyerah kalah,
Kerana rasa tidak lagi mampu untuk bertempur,
Kau boleh memohon kekuatan daripada-Nya.

Wahai sang srikandi,
Tatkala kau ingin meletakkan senjata,
Dan mengibarkan bendera putih,
Ada orang di sekelilingmu,
Yang memberi sokongan kepadamu,
Dan tidak ingin melihat kau menyerah kalah.
Kau bukan dan tidak pernah keseorangan.

Wahai sang srikandi,
Tatkala kau mengalirkan air mata,
Kerana kau rasakan betapa peritnya pertempuran ini,
Akan tiba satu masa,
Kau rasa jua betapa manisnya kemenangan itu,
Buat orang yang bersabar.

Wahai sang srikandi,
Kesatlah air matamu,
Angkatlah semula senjatamu,
Bangkitlah semula dari kesedihanmu,
Kerana pertempuran ini masih belum berakhir.

Usahlah kau lupa,
Kemenangan dan ketenangan akan kau kecapi jua,
Sekiranya kau terus bertempur,
Dan terus tabah,
Kerana janji-Nya itu pasti.

Wahai sang srikandi,
Usahlah sesekali kau menyerah kalah,
Sehingga kau menghembuskan nafasmu
Buat kali terakhir di bumi ini.

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. 15 Julai 2014. Selasa. 5:18 PM.
Happy Father's Day, Ba.

How long has it been since I last wished you that? It's hard to believe that it's already been 8-and-a-half years since you left us. How have you been, Ba? I hope things are fine with you on the other side. I made sure I sent you Al-Fatihah whenever I start missing you; which happens rather frequently these days. I don't know why. I wonder if it's got anything to do with a crush I'm having right now? *chuckles* Yes, Ba. Your daughter's actually in love right now. Can you imagine that? Even I laugh at myself when I think about it.

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12 June 2014 @ 08:07 pm
Haruslah aku berpijak di bumi yang nyata,
Tidak boleh di awangan selamanya,
Ku sedar diriku siapa,
Bukanlah si cantik jelita; apatah lagi sempurna.

Hakikatnya bukan mudah untuk ku telan,
Ku tahu kau bukanlah untukku,
Namun, sampai bila dapat ku bertahan,
Memendam rasa jauh di lubuk hatiku.

Sudah sampai masa untuk ku sedar,
Suatu hari nanti,
Kau akan menjadi milik dia,
Dia, si gadis yang sempurna sifatnya,
Yang manis wajahnya,
Yang hormati orang tua,
Yang elok agamanya,
Akan kau jadi milik dia;
Namun... gadis itu bukanlah aku.
Aku pasti akan itu.

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. 12 Jun 2014. Khamis. 8:07 PM.
I write and I write,
And no matter how much I write,
My feelings continue to overflow,
Incessantly, steadily;
No matter how much I write,
The feelings cannot be contained at all.

Yet, I continue to write,
On and on and on
Hoping that somehow,
These feelings would stop overflowing
And instead evaporate
Into memories of the past.

I write and I write,
But these feelings won't seem to budge;
They continue to flow ceaselessly, without fail.

I write these feelings away,
Hoping that they wouldn't be fixed so firmly
In the depths of my heart;
But even as I try to write these feelings away,
The heart gives birth to new ones,
Replacing the ones that I managed to write away.

My dear heart,
Why do you insist on doing so?
I'm trying to help you here,
Trying to keep these overflowing feelings at bay,
So that you don't end up getting hurt.

But why oh why do you insist on being stubborn?
Why do you insist on producing new, fragile hope each day?
Why don't you ever give up on those fragile hopes?
You have left me with no choice
And that's why I'll continue to write,
Until the day you realise that
Those feelings were nothing but
Crushed hopes and dreams.

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. May 14th, 2014. Wednesday.
26 May 2014 @ 12:28 pm
The clock is ticking,
The minutes whiz by,
The hours rush by,
The days dash into months,
Before you know it,
You're a step closer to dusty sleep.

As I sat and ponder,
I began to wonder,
Have I done enough for this world?
Have I contributed as much as possible?
How will I be remembered?
Or will my life amount to nothing but naught?

As I continue to ponder,
The hours continue to tick by,
Like an evanescent phantom,
They bid me goodbye.

What have I done with my life?
Was this truly how I wanted to live it?
Am I truly satisfied with the way things are?
When there are so many questions left unanswered.

Never have I tasted such pitiful despair,
Again and again, the disappointment resonates,
It's all too much for me to bear,
My false sense of hope; will they ever evaporate?

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. May 16th, 2014. Friday.
Aku cumalah sang pungguk yang rindukan bulan,
Tidak mampu untuk merangkul sang rembulan,
Yang kelihatan gah diselubungi awan,
Umpama ciptaan nan indah di balik kayangan.

Tidaklah ku mampu,
Untuk mencuri perhatianmu,
Kerana aku hanyalah sang pungguk,
Dan kau pula si merak kayangan.

Manalah mungkin,
Si merak kayangan dan si pungguk bersatu;
Walaupun di hati terdetik rasa ingin,
Lebih baik aku melupakanmu.

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. 14 Mei 2014. Rabu. 8:57 PM.
26 May 2014 @ 12:25 pm
It's way past midnight,
The spell has all disappeared;
All of that delight has completely vanished,
Just like what I had feared.

Will I ever be able to taste that magic,
That same way you made me giddy?
Will you once more cast that magic;
The one that made me so, very happy?

How is it fair;
For you to make me so excited,
So effortlessly; so flawlessly
How long will I be able to bear;
To bottle these frustrations within,
So painfully; so obliviously?

Composed by: Cerra Azizi. May 8th, 2014. Thursday.
It's the weekend,
But you're still on my mind;
You're nowhere near my sight,
Yet you seem to linger in my heart.

What is this craziness?
What is this hint of loneliness?
Why do I keep thinking about you,
When you obviously haven't got a clue?

I keep stealing glances,
Because I know I don't stand a chance;
The thought of you ever noticing me,
Just seems so very unlikely.

The love songs continue to play,
Not once have they gone away;
All these love songs remind me of you,
Of how hard I had fallen for you.

As the week begins anew,
I still think about you;
I know we'd never be together,
So please wake me up from this slumber.

You're my sweetest dreams,
You're my endless fantasy,
If only I can just scream,
How much you drive me crazy.

I've shed countless tears,
And poured my overflowing feelings,
Of how I'm always here,
But you'll never notice me.

Three months in and I still love you like crazy,
How time whizzes us by;
I know we were never meant to be,
And I guess this is my goodbye.

Composed by: Cerra Azizi, Sunday, May 25th, 2014. 7:23 PM.
Current Mood: artisticartistic
Current Music: Fynn Jamal - Arjuna Beta